Comments on: A Friend is…

By: mojotek

mojotek — Wed, 21 Dec 2005 21:24:31 +0000

Chris: Thanks for the link! One that jumped out at me - “Man who put cock in Peanut Butter jar is Fucking Nuts.”

By: Chris McElroy

Chris McElroy — Wed, 21 Dec 2005 18:27:58 +0000

I just want to be April’s friend. The whole sensitive lips, etc. just got to me. Can’t help it. I’m easy.

Confucious say: Man who jump off cliff, jump to conclusion.

More confucious for those that need more fortune cookie wisdom. http://www.humorsphere.com/confucius/

By: Laurie

Laurie — Wed, 21 Dec 2005 16:51:56 +0000

Now you’ve got me wanting some Asian food!! I love it, too. And I agree with you on the spice factor - I like just enough spice for a bite and zing, but not so much that my mouth is on fire and I cannot taste the flavors of the dish.

As for fortune cookie fortunes - I tend to take those with a grain of salt, but yeah, they do need some new writers or something!

By: mojotek

mojotek — Wed, 21 Dec 2005 14:29:26 +0000

April: Maybe TMI… but I think I started it with my last post. So no worries.

The Phoenix: Yeah, I think fortune writers have list a little of their luster to say the least.

JJ: I didn’t mention that once did I? It really is an absolutely appropriate fortune if you add ‘in bed’… guess I should have thought of that before I started writing.

Poobah: I think the Lotto commissions are in cahoots with the fortune cookie writers.

eric: true dat…

By: eric

eric — Wed, 21 Dec 2005 04:47:07 +0000

with a fortune like that i’d demand another cookie, if you’r gonna make the effort to tell me my fortune at least leave me with something useful like the powerball numbers for next week

By: Omnipotent Poobah

Omnipotent Poobah — Tue, 20 Dec 2005 20:05:03 +0000

I’m glad someone else has noticed this faux fortune conspiracy. Fortune cookies NEVER have true fortunes anymore, just lame “I Learned Everything I Need to Know in Kindergarten” affirmations.

It all started when they started putting lotto numbers on the backs of the slips if you ask me! GAMBLIN’ WILL THE RUINATION OF THIS WORLD BY JESUS!

By: JJ

JJ — Tue, 20 Dec 2005 19:25:38 +0000

You’re supposed to add “in bed” to the end of it.

So your brother’s fortune is “A friend is a present you give yourself in bed.” I guess “friend could be a guy or girl, depending on preference.
The other one you mentioned is “You will make great accomplishments someday in bed.” Sounds promising.
And The Phoenix gets “Being materialistic will only bring you emptyness in bed” which is still quite depressing.

By: The Phoenix

The Phoenix — Tue, 20 Dec 2005 18:01:29 +0000

I hate the fortunes that assume I’m doing something wrong like, “Being materialistic will only bring you emptyness.” What the hell??? I didn’t come here to eat great tasting food only to become depressed.

By: April

April — Tue, 20 Dec 2005 15:13:44 +0000

I am such a pussy when it comes to spicy food. My lips are very sensitive (get your mind out of the gutter) and when I eat spicy food it feels like the skin on my lips are melting away. Besides that I have IBS, which means that my asshole burns just as much, if not more, than my lips do. (TMI?)

I was all set to buy myself new clothes as a gift to myself, then you go and tell me that a friend is a present to give myself!! Well shit, a friend is much cheaper than clothes, so ya wanna be my new friend?? =)