If I had rugrats, they wouldn’t watch Power Rangers
Have you ever sat down and watched a full episode of Power Rangers? Did you puke, or go into an epileptic seizure? I watched the second half of an episode this weekend because I was down at the lake and it was the only show on the only station that came in. Don’t judge me.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but when I first found out about Power Rangers, there were only five of those jackasses. If that’s the case, how come I saw twenty of those scrotum-cheese goobers running around on the screen? How can there be that many now? Do kids with crappy Lycra costumes and lolly-pop helmets multiply that fast?
An what the hell is up with the plot? Or lack of one? From the part of the show I saw, I figured out there was a Power Ranger base where injured Power Rangers go have sex and recuperate. That’s also the same place they manufacture their robots that transform from sultry sex-pots into giant foam weapons spray-painted to look like Voltron.
The next part of the episode I was able to decipher was that all the Power Ranger enemies are required to be made of special effects foam. That and they either have space-age blue buck teeth or a spinning Christmas light head like the robot from Lost in Space that said “Danger, Danger Will Robinson!”
It also looks like the special effects team wanted to leave their mark in each shot because what looked like a battle taking place in a crater on some far off world was also a dumping ground for 1992 Nissans and 1988 Toyota Tercels. I shit you not, every big special effects explosion had at least one early model vehicle parked in the background, and they had nothing to do with the crappy plot.
I’ll be damned if I ever let my kids watch this nonsense. I’m not sure what shows I’ll let them watch while they raise themselves in front of the television, but I do know this one won’t be one of them.
I found the Power Rangers fun back in the early days - when the black ranger was black, the pink ranger was a girl, the yellow ranger was asian, blue was a boy, and red was indian (i think). I even went to the movie! I don’t think I’ve seen an episode in over a decade. Last I heard they were putting out new squads on a regular basis (i assume to deal with cast changes).
Speaking of rugrats, aren’t you supposed to be getting married and breeding soon?
The Power Rangers movie was so superbadass as a kid that I don’t think I ever recovered. Also, Amy Jo Johnson was hot.
OK, so my 3 year old loves, loves, loves the Power Rangers. I don’t get it now and I didn’t get it when they were popular in the nineties, an I limit TV time anyway. All I can say is that the Power Rangers are better than the Doodlebops anyday.
Robguy: I forgot they were that cliche with their casting/costume colors.
Married? Breeding? But I want to play World of Warcraft for few more years!
ACW: Wait… as a kid? Just how old are you? Am I officially old now? Wait, I just checked and the Power Rangers started in 1993. Still, I was in high school and I haven’t watched more than 4 episodes in my entire life.
And what is Amy Jo Johnson up to now? Looks like the pink Power Ranger is still trying to make it with music.
ADW: Doodlebops? Oh Jesus, is there more crap I’m going to have to worry about when I start breeding? What the hell are Doodlebops?
I was going to ask about Doodlebops too… I just heard of Wiggles and I guess they’ve been around for a while.
Robguy: Noooo! I saw them one time while I was flipping through channels and they completely disturbed me. How the hell is a kid supposed to ‘learn’ anything from that show. It just creeped me the fuck out.
You know, at least the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are funny.
Phoenix: True… at least that cartoon made a little sense. I haven’t had a chance to see the new TMNT movie though.
I was 12-13. Old enough to know it was stupid, but young enough that I was entertained by the likes of bad martial arts.
ACW: OK, maybe I don’t feel as old then. I think I must have been 15 or so… I guess that was old enough that all I was worried about was high school poonany.
Meh, I could never really swallow one single Power Rangers episode. Though I have greatly enjoyed some of the online parodies about them. Ever done a search for “Emo Rangers”?