MultiPlayer Dysfunction
Or ‘MPD’ for short. What is it you ask? Well, it’s what us people over the age of 25 that play Halo 2 (or any other online game) call wanting to break the necks of twelve year olds. I’ve said it before, but I hate how those immature shits act online. Its gotten to the point where I barely play online anymore. It’s basically just a bunch of immature highschoolers acting out their aggressions on XBox Live. I could give two piles of monkey doo how much middle school or high school sucks for you… but you need to get a hobby where you take out your pent up frustrations physically.
Sure, maybe a few of your trenchcoat-wearing buddies will giggle at your nerdy onslaught of insults, but that doesn’t mean shit’s gonna get better tomorrow in your second period P.E. class.
Fortunately I found that I’m not alone. This bitter ‘Too Old’ gamer has found a niche. It’s called 2Old2Play, [photopress:gamer.jpg,thumb,alignleft]and it makes me feel all fuzzy inside. Little did I know there was a group already on the internet that was tired of having to listen to kids that don’t even have pubic hair make you well aware they just “PWNED YOU n00b!”
Why am I bitter? Well, because I pay money to play these games for fun, but they end up making me more angry than I was before I started. Also, I don’t have the time or the patience to sit down and plot my strategies and make my alliances. I work a full time job and go to grad school classes at night. I just want to be able to come home from work, sit down in front of the TV and play Halo 2 for an hour and a half every few nights without having to listen to teenagers talk shit and spew racial slurs the whole time. Is that so much to ask? Maybe it is… hell if I know.
About the only thing I do know is that I suffer from MPD - Multiplayer Dysfunction. And this video by Mothergoat sums it all up. If that link doesn’t work, you can download it directly from mothergoat’s web site. OK, this over-the-hill first person shooter is gonna go take his aggression out on an office toilet…
I can’t say that I’m worse than my wife, but yah, many of those younger players put a lot more drama into playing the games than I care for (and some of the older ones too).
I feel your pain. Online gaming is a blast when you get a good game with good players. But the fucktards sure can try one’s patience.
I cannot relate because I do not play video games online. HOWEVER, the title MPD does not mean multiplayer dysfunction in the medical field. It means Multiple Personality Disorder. I only know this because I work in the medical field, not because I have MPD. Sheesh!!
Robguy: I can’t claim the wifey either… but drama is definitely somethign I don’t need when playing a video game.
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Zombie: It is fun when all your doing is trying to have a good time… but the damn fucktards never seem to go anywhere.
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April: Damn it April, leave it to you to bring some medical mumbo jumbo into this and ruin everyone’s good time! I keed I keed.
Wow, I didn’t even know this level of conflict was going on. The things I learn on your blog, Mojo! I can see why snivelling pre-pubescents might bug the hell outta ya…
Well im 19 and I dislike the way most gamers act just because there in someother country I will say one thing try what I do play custom games with people from your friends list it is much more fun without the Fucktards as you say
nicole: Welcome to the video game underworld!
Zetyian: I think that’s all I’m going to be doing from now on. Thanks!